Yes, it has been a while since I have posted. I spent weeks re-accessing just what I want in my creative life, as well, as de-cluttering, organizing and changing my office, and going through my entire house de-cluttering. There have been many trips to Goodwill and the used bookstore as well as a lot of garbage going out the door.
It was a lot of inner work as well as outer/environment work.
It’s funny, when you decide to de-clutter and work on things, a lot of demons that you thought were safely in their cages, decide to come out and wreck havoc.
This morning, I awoke feeling for the first time since starting all of this: clear and set.
OK, I’m done, I did it, I know where I’m heading now, time to get back to my writing and art!
So, I drew a card specifically for this post and got a good laugh.
It was the 7 of Spades.
Ah yes, the 7 of Spades is about going within, doing a lot of evaluating and paying attention to your intuition. It is also about valuing knowledge, freedom and independence.
One of the things that I worked through was setting boundaries for myself and understanding exactly what I wanted to be doing as a creative – and about letting go of the guilt or feelings that I should be doing what others think I should be doing.
The 7 of Spades doesn’t want to feel restricted but resists taking risks. That was exactly the conundrum I was feeling.
Her book is what launched me into taking my writing seriously about 15 years ago. I wasn’t sure I would need to go through it again, but it’s amazing how you can see things you didn’t see before, and realize there are still areas in your creative life that you need to work on.
Art and Abundance seems to constantly be this muddy entanglement we battle with as creatives. We either keep the day job and write/create on days off or we take a big leap of faith and work full-time not really knowing if/when the income will follow.
We are still drowning in the mass consciousness belief that art doesn’t pay the bills, well, except for the very lucky few out there.
This thought is what allowed me to take the leap and I realized I needed to embrace it again:
Why would we be given a passion/desire to create____________ (fill in blank here with the medium you love) and not be also given the ways/means of support to be able to still live?
Here is a quote from The Artists Way: “What we really want to do is what we are really meant to do. When we do what we are meant to do, money comes to us, doors open for us, we feel useful, and the work we do feels like play to us.”
There was a time in my life when I daydreamed about doing something very specific, but had absolutely no ways/means or knowledge of how to do it. I just sat and saw myself doing it.
Suddenly, things started happening that launched me into exactly what I wanted to be doing. There was no way I could have set all of it up with step by step actions. It all fell into place and I made good money doing it as well as it being one of the most fun,rewarding and fabulous jobs I have ever had.
There is no disclaimer on the above statement about what type of thing you have to want to do…it doesn’t say “Only for doctors, lawyers or investment bankers….or what your parents believe in or the hot job field of the month.”
I know from personal experience that the above works and works very well. I have been too focused on that mass consciousness gunk that has everyone thinking that only a select few make it and are successful as painters or writers (or whatever your passion is).
So, after clearing some gunk, and getting back to fully embracing what I want to really be doing, I’m also embracing the above quote from The Artists Way.
It feels good!
The metaphysical bookstore near me is going out of business and is having a closeout sale on everything in the store, so I went over to see if I could get a few new decks of tarot cards. I was hoping they would still have a deck that I’ve been wanting to get for some time, and sure enough they did!
It is the The Housewives tarot: A Domestic Divination Kit with Deck and Instruction Book
I love retro, I love the 50/60’s housewife icon and this deck looked like a lot of fun. One of the things so great about using a tarot deck when you are creating, either a story, or something visual, is you have all the various images to draw from in all the different decks.
After spending some time with my new deck this morning, I decided to draw a card from it specifically for today’s post- As a “just for fun, let’s see what I get” sort of thing.
After all, even though the readings from any divination tool is serious and very beneficial, we can also just have fun with it.
The card I drew was the Queen of Wands. I love this image! I got a chuckle out of it because the first thing that popped into my head was this: “WTF? Look at all I can do! I run circles around you and you are questioning me about what??”
The Queen of wands is the most charismatic figure of the tarot deck….let me list some words of what she exemplifies (and if you will, picture Bruno from Dancing with The Stars, standing, doing dramatic arm sweeps as he lists these words):
She is fiery, passionate, very creative, sensual, dynamic, when she wants something she gets it, successful, alluring and charming.
She is the woman all of us women wish we were and she is the woman men crave to have…baby, she has it all…and when she walks into a room, everyone takes notice and when she wants something, she’ll move heaven and earth to get it done!
Think the lady in red….ohhhh…lala….!!
Now, my intent is to bring the card around to how it can help us with our creativity and here is what came to mind:
As a creative- gosh, wouldn’t it be nice if we embodied the fiery queen of wands? We’d get our ideas done in the snap of a finger, while doing a million others things as well cooking the most scrumptious gourmet meal, making passionate love that sends our lover into such a state of bliss that they go into a 2 day coma all while looking so sexy that Angelina Jolie fears us. Hot damn!
Yea, well, I don’t know about you, but that hasn’t happened to me yet.
As a creative, I would just be happy with being able to get my stuff done!
But, what if we used the Queen of Wands as an energy to draw from? When we need that extra boost of something to help us get our stuck in the mud feet freed and get the idea ball a rollin’, what if we could tap into the power of her?
Ah, yes, that is the beauty of the one thing that we each have: the power of our imaginations…and the ability to pretend! Let me tell you, pretending isn’t just for kids! Its a gift we have and we should utilize it more often!
So, here is what hit me- the Queen of Wands….dressed in red, or with fiery red hair…encompassing the energy of fire….stay with me, but let me back up a little.
During the years that I studied interior decor ( and specifically color) and how our surroundings affected our mental, emotional and spiritual well-being, I used the color red and elements of fire to decorate with to help me light the fire on my creativity and to jump start myself on the path that I was passionate about. I was drawn to red in my clothes, I painted my entire entryway red and I have a lot of red in my living room decor. I needed something to balance out my tendency to always stay stuck in my emotions- I needed the fire/red energy to move me to action.
And, it did indeed work. Now, I don’t need all that red as much, but when I am feeling bogged down, stuck, unsuccessful or can’t get an idea off the ground, I tap into the power of color, the power of red and fire elements.
I even created a character that became a mentor for me. She would show up when I needed a boost and guess what? Yep, she was a fiery red-head who never took no for an answer, who sashayed into my day and dramatically kicked my creative ass into action!
When I needed her, I could conjure her up in my imagination and hear her talking to me, see her actions and in the same powerful way that having an actual person there to spur me on – I had her, when I needed her and the results were the same.
The Queen of Wands housewife isn’t clad in red, but you can see it in her face…you don’t mess with her and she isn’t a shy little wallflower. She may just be a housewife (writer/artist) but baby, she knows how to get it done and get it done with flare!!
The message I got with this card today was that we have all this power we can access. No, its not set aside for only for the very special, or the already wealthy or the genius, we each have it: I’ll say it again…the always there for us, never let us down power of the imagination.
We can create that Queen of Wands attitude when we need a boost and we need to get er dun!
Ah, look! There she is, she just walked into your office/studio…see her standing there? Her red nails tapping on the edge of your desk….what are you two going to set on fire today?
It was the late 70’s. I was a senior in high school and dating my first husband, who was five years older than myself. One night, I was at his place and he pulled out an album-Dan Fogelberg’s Netherlands. Sure, I had heard of Dan Fogelberg and knew his hits, but I had not heard Netherlands before.
He put the album on. I sat back as the homemade speakers spilled out this amazing song. (Thank you Jeff for building such awesome speakers!)
I heard each nuance and instrument and it was then and there that I was hooked and transfixed by the artistry of Dan Fogelberg.
From that point on, his music wove in and out of the tapestry of my life. I would buy an album and so many of the songs were so similar in topic to what I was going through.
But, for some odd reason, I never heard Dan speak or heard an interview with him even though he became one of my artistic heroes as I embarked on my own creative journey.
I was stunned and so saddened to hear of Dan’s passing due to prostrate cancer and did a post about it in another blog I had at the time.
His music had been a part of my creative projects in so many ways. I’d listen while painting; I’d listen while getting ideas for a fiction piece.
So, when I heard about this blog tour and the 2 CD album that was a retrospective and interview of Dan’s work on the 25th anniversary of his career, I knew I wanted to be a part of it.
After listening to the CD, I was even more enamored with how Dan created.
His music and words were always so deep and he knew how to tap into mood, weather, setting and emotions. He was indeed not just a musician, but a storyteller.
In listening to the interviews, I saw that Dan knew how to take the little snippets of his life – even ones that were not all that dramatic -and from them he went deeper, adding in the setting around him. Not only were the words powerful but the musical arrangements took the listener to the place where he was-to the top of the mountain; to the streets of Tucson; to the cabin in Tennessee…and created songs that we all could connect to and songs that gave us hope and made us feel that even when life seemed to suck, we could go on.
Hearing Dan talk about his path of creativity was so inspiring for me as an artist.
Sales of this CD benefits Prostate Cancer Foundation in the amount of $3.00 from each CD
sold.
This 2 CD Collector’s Edition is available for $29.95 at: FM Odyssey Radio
If you are a Dan Fogelberg fan, it is a very worth while purchase to hear him talk about the making of some of his songs.
I didn’t have the time with this post to go further into his insights for this blog tour, but I will be posting more on some of the things he brought up that are great lessons for those of us living the artist/writer/creative life.
I am very grateful to have been able to be a part of this and to have the CD to listen to.
Thank you Fred for such a great interview and for putting this out there for all of us to enjoy, learn from and to remember one of the greats.
Did you just furrow your brows at that question? Did you take a moment to think about it? Maybe you are saying…wait a minute, it takes someone sensitive to be creative!
photo credit: telemetry9
Today, I drew the 2 of Hearts. I have drawn it several times in the past week, so I took a closer look at it today.
The 2 of Hearts is about partnerships, romance and affairs. But there is another aspect of it: the overly sensitive person. A 2 of Hearts type:
Deeply affected by your surroundings
Sensitive to how others think of you and treat you.
You have a tremendous need for everyone to love, support,encourage, acknowledge and accept you.
If you don’t feel you have the above, you can become ill or depressed.
You often misunderstand the motives of others.
Your sensitivity distorts your perception of the actions of others.
You have a strong desire to learn and knowledge nourishes your soul.
You tend to chose one thing over another.
You yearn for companionship.
You can sabotage relationships based on false expectations.
I’ll (begrudgingly) admit, this is so me. And, yes, it held me back in my creative endeavors for a big part of my life.
While the sensitivity helped my creativity, it also sabotaged it. It held me back from doing what I really wanted to do because I was waiting to receive permission, support and acceptance and I was basing too much on the need for others to give me the nod before I tried something.
Let’s face it, while we can have many loving, supportive people in our lives, when it comes to creating-especially in the creative arts- folks react to it in so many ways: jealousy, envy, denial, beliefs in lack or the misconception that nothing in the creative arts can succeed,or just plain ole lack of knowledge in that area.
If we are overly sensitive to types like that, it can blow a hole right through our ideas and sink us fast.
As well, being overly sensitive can keep us from taking those first few steps in making an idea a reality. It takes work to get a jumble of ideas out of our heads and down on paper, or onto a canvas or whatever medium we have chosen. It takes time and devotion to step away from our usual routine and begin creating. We are going to experience some type of reaction from those around us regardless of how supportive they are. Acting on the desire to create is powerful energy and it does rock the boat we are in.
Does any of this sound familiar to you?
Are you a 2 of hearts type?
Has it affected your desire to create?
This week, I’ll be posting more on this: the advantages to being overly sensitive and how to use it to unleash your creativity, and, how to keep your sensitivities from sabotaging your desire to create.
For today’s Thursday Thirteen, I decided to list the things that get my creative juices flowing. These are things that stir both my visual artwork and my writing.
Being with my other writer friends; we share or talk about our writing and I always want to go home and write after wards. Writers can be loners- we need to talk with and be around other creative writers.
Watching a movie with interesting characters or a theme that inspires a new storyline for me.
Looking at Decorating magazines-this has always been the case for me. One of my favorite things to do as a kid was to look through my mom’s decorating books and pretend that those rooms/homes belonged to someone and then I would go off into my imagination about what those people were doing and how they lived. Still today, I can glance through a decorating magazine, find a room and suddenly see characters!
Music- music is such a strong emotion invoker for me. When I listen to music, I see scenes for my characters and it can also stir things up visually.
Watching the background in movies- I spend more time looking at what is in the background in movies than I do on the characters sometimes. It goes back to looking at a room and feeling a story. I take note of the walls and what’s on them as well as the setting. Great backgrounds stir new art and story ideas for me!
Dreams- In my dreams, there might be a snippet of dialogue or an odd person or an odd place that stays with me after I wake up-those are always fodder for getting the juices flowing!
Reading works by great authors- this really helps when I feel what I am writing is dry or lacking something. I pick up a book by Barbara Kingsolver or Jane Austin or other really good writers and even after reading a few paragraphs, I’ll get an idea of what to do next with mine.
Imitating sentences- this is something I learned in the last workshop I attended by L. McKenna Donovan. We learned to find sentences by other good writers and to break them down and imitate them. Its not an easy thing to do, but doing this always gives me a new perspective and many times will help me move past a block.
Taking a bubble bath or swimming- hey, its a fact, water has negative ions and negative ions help us with our creativity! Time in water for me is transformational! I start asking my characters whats up or I meditate and bam!-the answers are there as I relax in a mound of juicy bubbles!
Walking through an Art Gallery. This is pretty much a no-brainer, but I love looking at artwork in galleries if I need inspiration.
Watching reality shows where creativity is the theme Shows like Project Runway and Top Chef inspire me!
Traveling- Going to new places always stirs my imagination. Writers and artists can write off all travel for that reason, correct?
Dealing with powerful emotions-this is going to be a topic for another post, but when I go through something that has powerful emotions- after I have recovered- I can use those feelings to evoke scenes or experiences for characters or even for color ideas for artwork.
Today I drew the 8 of Diamonds from the regular playing cards deck. This is truly a power card. It’s about lots of talent, lots of power and lots of money!
Wooohooo…what an awesome card to draw!
Then I drew from a tarot deck ( Pearls of Wisdom Tarot Deck (Cards)
) and I drew The Sun.
As always, I love the serendipity of the drawings. The 8 of Diamonds is known as the sun card.
One of the thoughts that the Sun shares is: True freedom exists when we are free from the fear of loss.
I got to thinking about the state of our society right now. So many people who were use to having it all, are now facing losing it all. The American life of the big house and the big car and whatever material possessions we want-we can have, is collapsing. The material things and the balance in our bank accounts and the status of those things, for some, is what defined us. What defines us when we lose it all? Who are we if we have to move in with our parents, or start delivering pizzas instead of being the big guy on the block who had everything?
The other irony of this card draw for me is that this is exactly what the protagonist in my novel is going through. She based her life on her success and material acquisitions – she is then thrown a curve ball by having to go back to her roots and past, something she has avoided for a really long time, and she *thinks* that it will, in the end, add some more to her bottom line. Instead, she learns what real abundance is.
We became such a disconnected society. Now, with what is going on, we are learning to reconnect. Before, when we needed help, we whipped out the checkbook and paid for help. Now, communities are coming together to provide help, not with monetary exchanges, but with hands on help.
The message of the 8 of diamonds is that with abundance and power comes responsibility.
The message of the Sun card is that we have choices to make and we need to make them based on careful observations and practical application.
It is humans who do the work of the Divine. When our hands refuse to reach out and help, the bounty of the Sun (Divine) is limited and lack is experienced.
How is this about creativity? Creativity is power. Ideas are power and can create abundance. We are going through a time when we need new ideas; we need new perspectives and the ideas that we share with our creativity can help move us in a new direction. We also need to support one another. We have lived the time in America when it was all about competition and about seeing who could grab onto the most and have it all to themselves. And, how did that work out for us?
There is nothing wrong with abundance; the Sun card and the 8 of diamonds affirms that Divine infinite provision is offered, and we do live in the land of plenty and endless bounty. Creativity- that ability to create our reality- that innate power within us, is always there. We can responsibly utilize it or we can destroy everything with it.
Maybe we should have a new slogan- instead of “What’s in your wallet?” – how about “What’s in your creative hands?”
I have always wanted to write -and was writing years ago, then stopped. Due to a lot of little miracles, I’m back. I pulled out a story I had started years ago and am finishing it.
Here are 13 things I’ve discovered since then.
Don’t try to write alone and w/o support from other writers. You need to know the madness is OK.
Take a writing workshop -it’s amazing how much better and more consistent you’ll become.
I don’t read romance novels. I said I wasn’t writing a romance. I’m writing a romance.
Your characters and their world take over yours.
Other writing friends are invaluable.
When you proclaim you are a writer, you are a writer.
A writer sits and does the work, day in and day out.
On some days that works totally sucks. But that’s ok. This is one job where sucky work is ok and expected.
With this job, if you decide to sit and watch movies all day, its ok -its research.
But you can only do that once in a while, the rest of the time, you have to sit and do the work.
My characters tell me where the story is going and they have made me cry.
Yesterday, because they were talking to me, I put the phone in the garbage can. This happens a lot.
Family members eventually learn to recognize that look in your eyes that lets them know you are off in your characters world and they finally stop mentioning the Psyche ward.
I came across a new weekly meme called Tarot Tuesday and decided to join in. A card is drawn each Friday from a variety of decks and we all post our thoughts about the card on Tuesdays.
The card drawn this week was from the Pen Tarot -this is not your typical deck in regards to the images, but from what I have seen, it is a beautiful deck. They are each black and white ink drawings with only one piece of the image in color.
When I first saw this card, what struck me right off in the image were her eyes. Now, maybe it is just because I am viewing the image on the computer, but all I could see were these completely dark eyes. I thought about that for a while.
The Moon card relates to our obscured vision-that until we go within and understand our deeper selves, we can’t evolve.
It is so easy to go through life with darkened eyes…with eyes that refuse to truly see and we become afraid of everything, only because we avoid things by deeming them wrong or fearful.
I am a Cancer and the Moon is what rules Cancer. I love going deep. I have always been fascinated by the workings of the psyche and what makes people tick. I am also many times too sensitive, absorbing others stuff and I spent many years deep in depression. But, it was the journey of going deep within that allowed me to come back out, and to come out with skills to end my depression and to be able to see life with new eyes.
I have always loved the moon. Where my bed is positioned, moonlight falls on my face as I sleep. I closely watch the cycles of the moon and I love moonlit filled darkness.
Darkness can be scary, but the Moon card tells us that we need not fear, we need to examine those dark places, because on the other side is bright, joyous light.
Happy Moonlighting.
If you would like to join in on this meme here is what you do:
1. Visit Tarot Tuesday on or after Friday to see this week’s Tarot Card.
2. Write a post on your blog inspired by the image or the questions.
3. Use Mr. Linky to add your link to the Tarot Tuesday link list.
4. Drop a comment in the comments for the week, and we’ll add you to the participant’s blog list.
5. We encourage you to visit other Tarot Tuesdays to see what inspiration others found.
The 6 of Clubs is my birth card (did you know you can find out your birth card in a regular deck-so cool!)
Yet, I would say that the 3 of spades describes a big part of my life.
The 3 of spades is creative inspiration – it is such a strong creative energy, that unless the person is focused on a venue for that energy, they can become scattered and indecisive.
I am one of those who has too many ideas and I don’t like staying with one for a long time. I could never work for the same company my whole life or work on a factory line. I can’t stand routine or ruts. I’m not one who enjoys strict structure and rules. I like dabbling here and there, trying out a multitude of ideas that flood my head as I try to fall asleep. Barbara Sher even wrote a book for folks like me:Refuse to Choose!: Use All of Your Interests, Passions, and Hobbies to Create the Life and Career of Your Dreams
The 3 of spades MUST express themselves. It is about varied interests and being talented on more that one front ( I seriously envy those who have one great talent and they are working in a field using that talent) and those who are this card are good at a lot of different jobs. The issue happens when the person is unsure of their goals in life; all that creative energy turns to worry. Constant, debilitating worry.
What this card teaches is that with enormous creative energy one must also utilize patience and persistence; one must also have a clear cut goal.
I knew exactly what the card was saying to me when I drew it. In an earlier post, I realized I needed a new list of goals. Well, as exciting as that is, I went into hysterics over it…..because I like to dabble in so many things. And I tend to feel that I need to let go of what I am currently working on and try something new.
What the card was saying to me was: If you want to achieve success, adopt a slow but sure approach. Listen to your intuition and inner vision.
Allow the creative energies to be the source of inspiration, not a distraction.
What I have learned is that we can know we are on the right path (with a job, a relationship, a project) when what we need to make it work appears for us. A mentor, help, advice, materials, education and of course positive feelings about all of it. Then it is a matter of sticking to it and using the creative energy to feed it. The trick is in realizing that a lot of creative energy can also feel like discontentment: a feeling that we should go off in another direction instead. It can be hard to discern a lot of energy from restlessness and confusion over what to do.
In talking with other writers about writing a novel, we all are experiencing that realization that it takes time-dedicated, focused time. Its an odd gig. It can take years to complete. Unlike a painting that we can watch come together and even if it takes a few weeks or a few months, the end result is there in front of us, we can see it, touch it. A novel in progress is partly in our heads, some on paper, some on the hard drive. Months can be spent on research, weeks doing something else while it brews in our subconscious. Folks can’t see the work we are doing.
But, the creative energy is flowing through us; it can feel antsy, disheveled, and it can make us worry. Are we on the right track? Is this project going to be worth it in the end? Why am I really doing this? Is it as good as I originally thought it would be?
The thought for today is: Be easy on yourself. With a lot of creative energy comes opportunities and ideas, which can lead to indecision and stress. if unsure of what direction to go in, go do something physical, move, go out into nature…then tune in to your inner voice and trust yourself.
Are you one who can stick with something for a really long time and see the outcome? Or, do you like to go off in a hundred different directions? Do you have a way to keep yourself on track?
I’m spoiled.
